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Did I slight the second guy?

  • Yes

    Votes: 1 2.6%
  • No

    Votes: 38 97.4%

  • Total voters
    39
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Discussion Starter #1
Posted an item for sale and within 5 minutes a forum member said they would take it.

About an hour later another forum member said they wanted it and ready to pay.

I told him that I need to check with the first guy to make sure he wants it and would get right back.

Second guy then backs out and says I slighted him because he was ready to buy at the moment.

I just wanted to check with the first guy because...well...he was first.

So I bring this to the forum. Did I slight the second guy?
 

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That is called as far as I know "Not Being a Dick"
I was recently selling a vehicle privately through kijiji, had one guy contact me, and it was a bit of a drive for him, we made arrangements to meet, and then had a second guy contact me, he was very eager to see it.
I told him the first guy had already made arrangements and I didn't feel it fair to undermine him as he was already making plans to see it, unfortunately it meant the second guy couldn't see it until the next night.
Long story short, first guy passed, and the second guy found something else in the meantime, but I still feel I did the right thing. No regrets.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
The first guy responded about 20 min later telling me to feel free to sell to the second guy but I dont think thats going to happen.
 

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If it was a bricks and mortar store, customers might have pulled a numbered ticket from a dispenser, and if the last one of something got sold to the person a single digit ahead of you, well that's how it goes. Unfortunately, with online transactions, there is no discernible timestamp, except to the vendor, who can see which e-mail offer they received first. Buyers cannot see the same information unless one makes a point of doing a screengrab and sending it to them. That would certainly prove that they were in line behind others, but it would also contravene the first buyer's privacy (which they are entitled to).

So what it ends up boiling down to is the buyer's trust that you're being straight with them and not simply trying to wangle a higher selling price out of them. And at that point, what we're dealing with is the buyer's personality more than anything else.

What can I say? Some folks are very distrustful of online sales. They're not alone in their paranoia, but if they don't trust it, then they shouldn't play there, and should simply go to retailers, where they can have the assurances they desire.

Having said that, it is possible to provide reassurances to the second or third buyers in line. A bit of wordsmithing can ease nerves, and let folks know that you'll get back to them ASAP, once the first person in line either forks over the money, or bails. Although I suppose there are some whose nerves are more difficult to ease, even with wordsmithing, or else are easily distracted by other things, and have to either instantly commit to a purchase, or else they lose interest.
 

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I see nothing wrong with what you did. I always try to go in order of contact, although I will sometimes give priority to a local sale over shipping (and I usually say so in my listings). If the first person in line takes what I feel is too much time, I'll send them a message with a deadline saying: "I have an eager buyer ready, but you have first dibs. Please get back to me by X time/day or I will have to go with the next buyer in line."
 

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I see the offended party voted, had to LOL. That minority percentage is going to get smaller and smaller as the thread goes along.

Still a butthurt dick.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
If the first person didnt respond for many hours thats one thing but he responded about 20 min after I told him about another buyer.

The second buyer recinded his offer within 5 to 10 min due to this "slight".

Now...who wants to buy my speaker! LOL
 

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No, you did the right thing.

Having said that I've run into the same thing a couple of times over the past few months. If you want to buy something you should be prepared to pay for it right away. I'm happy to put something on hold if asked but please don't PM and say "I'll take it" and then disappear for a couple of days.
 

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You let your "yes" be "yes" when you agreed with the first member to sell it to him. If you would have sold it to the second member, you would not be a person of your word. You did the correct thing and the second member needs to re-think his standards.
 
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First come, first served so no you were not being a dick.
I agree with you - but there can be extenuating circumstances.

A member was selling a couple of pedals. I contacted him that I wanted one of them. He got back to me shortly after, saying he had an offer come in after mine that was to buy both pedals. He really wanted to sell them as a pair. I said go ahead and sell them to him, there'll always be another one over the horizon. I got the sense he would have scuppered the pair deal if I was insistent.

Communications is a wonderful thing.
 

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I think you did the right thing.

I was lined up to buy something on another board. Price and delivery was agreed upon, everything confirmed - then he takes a reverb deal, at a loss, because I couldnt get it that day (but two days later). Funny thing was, i checked reverb that day and the week before - no listing. I messaged him asking why he had confirmed everything, then backed out. It screwed things up pretty good. I havent blasted him online because i figure i'll let karma do its thing.

Some people just cant handle people keeping their word when it comes to "first come first served".
 

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If the seller tells someone he will sell it them but if someone else comes with the money in hand, that he could lose the sale he is not obligated to hold the item. If that is not done, he should keep his word and keep the item for the first person.
 
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As a seller, I encountered the same scenario.
Informed second responder that if the first backs out, he's up next.
I was also informed the same when I was a buyer.
Sometimes the first guy did back out and I got the sale.

One time, some kid was selling a neck and told me that
'someone else wants it too, but if you give me x more, you can have it'.
Me - 'Oh well, let the other guy have it then'.
Him - 'He backed out. You can have it'.
I offered less than originally because I knew he was screwing with me.
 
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